Discovering Shared Humanity through Faith and Fluidity

Born into a secular Dutch family and raised across three continents, master of theological studies candidate Perlei Toor embodies the interconnectedness of humanity.

“I’ve never been local anywhere,” she says, reflecting on a childhood marked by constant movement—from South Korea to Hong Kong, the UK, Ghana, and back to the Netherlands for university. While her international upbringing gave her a broad perspective, it also instilled a deep sense of being “the outsider,” a theme that continues to influence her life and her evolving relationship with religion.

Raised in what she describes as a “very secular, very atheist” culture, Perlei’s early understanding of religion was shaped by skepticism.  

“Dutch secularism is not just non-religious; it’s deeply suspicious of religion,” she explains. “We thought of ourselves as objective, rational, and open-minded, which meant seeing religious people as the opposite—closed-minded and irrational.” 

Her journey into spirituality began during the pandemic, at the age of 18, while struggling with an eating disorder that therapy alone could not alleviate. Encouraged by a non-religious therapist to try prayer, she thought she might as well, despite her atheistic reservations.  

“I said no two or three times. I was so skeptical,” she recalls. With no understanding of how to pray, Perlei turned to a WikiHow article for guidance.  

“I Googled ‘how to pray’ and there's this little image of Queen Elizabeth in The Crown, in her long nightgown, kneeling by the bed … I didn’t even know who I was praying to … I just said, ‘God, if this is helpful, let me know.’” 

To her surprise, prayer was a tangible experience for her, as she felt “God’s presence and God’s love” through the act. From then on, she says, prayer became a very rational tool in her recovery.  

Perlei was able to rationalize the feeling of hunger as an indication of how natural it should be to feed ourselves.  

“In the end, a lot of eating disorders are about control,” she says. “My relationship with God gave me a framework to let go of control and trust in something bigger than myself.” 

This unexpected experience with spirituality opened a door to rethinking her assumptions about religion. As she began to explore faith more intentionally, she turned to academic study. Initially enrolling in an introductory course on religion by chance, she quickly found herself becoming more engaged as her many questions about secularism gave way to an increasing familiarity with a variety of religious texts.  

She had many questions about secularism's fear of discussing death and how the church can be a platform for having conversations about mortality and about death. However, alongside her personal journey with prayer and her intellectual engagement with religion, an awareness took over that she could not study it without appreciating it in a lived way.  

“My attitude towards religion completely changed when I started to experience some of that myself,” she reflects.  

Bringing Religious and Ideological Analysis and Fluidity to HDS   

For Perlei, the intersection of religion and politics is especially compelling. “Coming from the Netherlands, I had always put secularism on a pedestal,” she says. “But I’ve come to see that secularism has its own biases. It doesn’t always protect religious minorities or foster inclusivity.”  

This realization has shaped her academic focus at Harvard Divinity School, where she studies the interplay of secularism, religion, and nationalism. “It’s about dismantling the binary—religion versus secularism—and understanding how they influence each other,” she explains. Through courses like "Religion and Public Life," she has unpacked the “assumed objectivity” of secularism and explored how faith communities contribute to civic engagement.

Read about CRPL student Perlei Toor at hds.harvard.edu.